How do you deal with fear?

This post is out of place as it comes after other runs but its the only important one right now.

I went up Fan Brycheiniog today with Claire and Tilly today and I really struggled with vertigo to the point that I was walking well inside the path to stay off the ridge.  I don’t understand it it. It’s like not being able to see straight, everything shifts weirdly. To be fair some of this was helped when Claire put Tilly on the lead because I was sort of freaking out about internally about losing the the dog over the edge. I knew it wasnt going to happen but in my head right then it could.

I can do this, its a struggle at heights, I spin out, the ground feels like its moving and I dont understand it as I can run the cliffs at home happily. I need to get used to it. I think if id been alone and running I could have dealt with it better. Running you just deal with it, you deal with the pain and just go on, there isnt the thinking time.

I can do this. I’ll keep saying I can do this. It was embarrassing today that I had to admit i was in trouble. It was to Claires credit that she never once mentioned it afterwards and im guessing didn’t push me on that path but let me choose other routes. I guess thats what friends are for eh. Tilly was just happy being out. I dunno I loved every moment of being out. We did 10 miles, we bitched and moaned and happily (yeah right) squelched our way through miles of bog. But I cant escape the fact Im scared of heights and Im not quite sure how to fix it.

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Thats the ridge walked
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Tilly rocking the cairn
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Tilly at the peak

Author: Gareth

Running coastal trails in South Wales and working on a healthier body and mind

5 thoughts on “How do you deal with fear?”

  1. Fear of heights is quite normal I’d say. Loads of ppl I know cannot do cliff walks etc because of it. You might not get or think of the anxiety while you exercise as it is similar symptoms like high heart rate? I think I just read about it in the book ‘Spark’ … it also usually gets bigger if focussed on it … so while running you focus on where to put the foot rather than other things …

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Worth giving that book a look? I think you’re probably right about the focus. I feel in control when i run alone. Yesterday I had time to think and that exacerbated it. Ive an idea to try running it or something similar (less steep as I dont think I can do 4 miles of climb like that haha) alone.

      Like

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